God's been asking me a tough question lately. It makes me squirm. I know I could give the right answer, but would I mean it? Does my heart believe it?
His question is: "Do you believe that I am good?"
Here's the thing. I know God is good, I've known it all my life, in my head. But when things get hard and I have to give up control, do I believe it then?
He's not just asking me if He's good, He's asking me lots of other things too. Do I believe He knows my heart's desires, what's best for me (more than I do), and that He will lead me into these things? Is He trustworthy? Does He have perfect timing?
Or do I believe He's cruel? Do I believe He intentionally created me, placing my desires, my passions, in my heart, only to withhold them? Does he give me good things in life only to take them away or let them fall away without any promise of better things to come?
The truth is, I've spent significant time trying to control things in my life because I've thought I knew what's best for me. But I've surrendered. Not by choice; really, I feel quite forced into it. When you reach a point where you've put everything you've had into something and still not gotten the outcome you wanted, you realize you're not in control.
Here's the truth: God is my perfect Father. He created me, every intricate detail of me, He knows me intimately and cares about every detail of my life. He is waaaaaay more qualified to control my life than I am. Like the best dad, he won't withhold any good thing from me, his daughter.
I choose to believe this. God, you are so good.
Wednesday, November 18, 2015
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
i'm going to LA for a missions trip!
So all Bethel students go on outreach trips in the spring. I was pretty excited about the possibility of doing a mission trip overseas, but God had something different in mind for us this year! Bethel School and Church have decided for the first time ever to send all of their students and as many church members as possible to the same place, Los Angeles, to be a part of a unique event called Azusa Now! After a ton of prayer and consideration they have total confidence this event is God's idea and are sending us full force to be a part of what He is going to do!
The event is headed up by Lou Engle, known for organizing huge prayer rallies and a former senior leader of International House of Prayer (IHOP). The event will be held on April 9, 2016, the 110th anniversary of the Azusa Street Revival, which was an incredible outpouring of the Spirit that took place in LA in 1906, where the Body of Christ was unified among different races, and many salvations, healings, and miracles took place.
All Bethel students will spend several days in LA surrounding the event sharing the gospel and ministering to people with love and prayer. At the event we will be scattered throughout the stadium ministering to people and believing God for miracles of salvation as well as outpourings of his love and power! It will also be a unifying time across races and denominations, as many diverse ministries and churches will be involved.
Here's the promo video for our trip:
I will be raising support for this trip, $1300 in total. If you would like to partner with what God is going to do in me and in the people of LA, please donate at this link:
Regardless of whether you support me financially, I will be so thankful for your prayers! We are believing God is going to use this to bring transformation to one of the biggest cities of America, and that from this event history will be made and nations will be changed! (We pray big prayers because our God is big and powerful!)
PS, I'm going on another outreach trip to Reno next weekend, the 20-21st. Your prayers are appreciated and I'll be updating you afterwards! :)
The event is headed up by Lou Engle, known for organizing huge prayer rallies and a former senior leader of International House of Prayer (IHOP). The event will be held on April 9, 2016, the 110th anniversary of the Azusa Street Revival, which was an incredible outpouring of the Spirit that took place in LA in 1906, where the Body of Christ was unified among different races, and many salvations, healings, and miracles took place.
All Bethel students will spend several days in LA surrounding the event sharing the gospel and ministering to people with love and prayer. At the event we will be scattered throughout the stadium ministering to people and believing God for miracles of salvation as well as outpourings of his love and power! It will also be a unifying time across races and denominations, as many diverse ministries and churches will be involved.
Here's the promo video for our trip:
I will be raising support for this trip, $1300 in total. If you would like to partner with what God is going to do in me and in the people of LA, please donate at this link:
(Just type Cassandra Beck in the box under Give Now - Search for a Traveler)
If you prefer, you can mail a check made payable to Bethel Church, with Azusa Now written on the check and with a note that designates the funds are for me. Here's the address:
Bethel Church
ATTN: Bethel Mission Trips Department
20 Lake Blvd.
Redding, CA 96003
Regardless of whether you support me financially, I will be so thankful for your prayers! We are believing God is going to use this to bring transformation to one of the biggest cities of America, and that from this event history will be made and nations will be changed! (We pray big prayers because our God is big and powerful!)
PS, I'm going on another outreach trip to Reno next weekend, the 20-21st. Your prayers are appreciated and I'll be updating you afterwards! :)
Sunday, November 1, 2015
reno, round one.
I just got back from my first ever Bethel ministry trip! Every BSSM student submits their top five city service choices, which are anything from doing landscaping in parks, to ministering in retirement homes, to dancing on stage during worship, to street evangelism, to doing under-privileged women's hair and makeup, etc. etc. When I read through the options, one stood out dramatically for me: once monthly overnight ministry trips to Reno, Nevada. We would be ministering to people in casinos, bars, and on the streets, and we would partner with a local organization which fights sex trafficking in Reno with opportunities to potentially minister to girls who have come out of prostitution, as well as the women, pimps, and johns who are involved currently in the sex trade in Reno.
Of all the options, why this one? For one thing, I feel possibly called to ministry that partners with women one-on-one who need inner healing, and ministering to women coming out of sex trafficking certainly is that. But also, I just want to be stretched so much! I want to be pushed far out of my comfort zone so that the only way anything can happen is if God works through me. Well, I guess this was God's pick for me too, because I got accepted for this city service and just returned from my first trip to Reno!
As our first trip, we learned a lot about what fighting these issues even looks like in Reno. Prostitution is legal in Nevada, and the sex trade and casinos are what largely fund the state, including the state's schools. Because of this, simply bringing girls out of sex trafficking isn't enough to fix the city's problems. We were sent out to minister to anyone and everyone, not just looking for prostitutes. And the organization we partner with is involved in working to change the system, not just individuals. Our team (which will be about 35 people including second and third year BSSM students) got to pray and prophesy over many of the organization's team members and women who I think have been brought out of trafficking. You can imagine, their work is very difficult and holding on to hope is a constant battle. But they were so encouraged and strengthened by our team, it was so amazing!
Our first afternoon we went out and ministered to homeless people. That night we went into the casinos and on the streets to minister to people, and the next day we went to Carson City (Nevada's capital) to minister to people at the Nevada Day Parade. I've never done anything like this before! I was really nervous but experienced a ton of breakthrough, both in taking personal risks to talk and pray with people, in praying for healing, and giving prophetic words. I was so surprised to find how receptive people were overall. Though we definitely faced rejection (breaking off fear of man), we also got to bless so many who were deeply hungry for love and for truth! Following are several testimonies/stories from this weekend...
When we were sent out to minister to the homeless, a guy in my group challenged me and another girl to go after a lady who walked by us while we were ministering to a homeless man named Steve. Up to this point I had allowed the more experienced members of the group take the lead as I observed, but now I was being forced to lead! I practically ran after this lady and when I caught up I asked her if she was in a hurry. She willingly stopped to talk and right away asked if we knew a guy named Tim (also from our team, in another group). I learned later that Tim had just ministered to her and bought her chicken, and she told us she was just singing Jesus Loves Me to herself as she walked. But when I told her we felt like God told us to come pray for her she said she would gladly receive prayer from us! She had bandages on her knee so I told her I'd pray for that and she wanted prayer for her family as well (without giving details). I prayed over her, telling her how much God loves her and how obviously he was pursuing her to tell her that today. I prayed for her knee which she said was feeling better, and I prayed for her family. I felt led to pray that she would bring peace to end fighting and conflict in her family. When I finished she was in awe. She was so blessed, so thankful, and felt so loved, and she said it was as if we saw straight through her! Because it turns out she just finished taking conflict resolution classes because she so wanted this for her family. Her name was Esther.
I also got to minister to a beautiful, vibrant older homeless woman named Devony. Devony is a believer, and so she was very encouraged as we spoke to her and prayed for her back, and much of her back pain went away. We prayed for provision and for deep relationships for her in this time.
In the evening, we split up into small groups and went into casinos. No one in my group had done this ministry before, so we were very nervous and wandered for awhile trying to get up the nerve to talk to someone. A man named Doc was a casino worker, and when we walked up to him he did a magic trick for us with cards. He was kind of a strange man, very intense and good at what he does. When he finished we talked to him a bit, but then we all began to walk away, all feeling a pull to pray for him but not knowing how. Something in me rose up though and I felt like, what do I have to lose?! I said "hey Doc, do you have pain in your feet?" and he told us that he does have pain in his feet from always standing. I asked him if we could pray for them to be healed and he (surprisingly to me) said yes! He stood there staring at me as I began to pray for him. I first blessed him, calling out things I saw in him like a kind heart and great intelligence. Then I prayed for his feet to be healed, that all the pain would leave. I blessed him and prayed he would know God's love for him. I could be wrong, but I thought as I prayed and looked in his eyes that I saw tears. He thanked us genuinely, and we went on our way.
After that, I was so worked up and excited! The guys with me were so affirming and thankful I stepped out, and we got bolder from there. We talked with and prayed for or blessed many people who were at the slot machines, talked with and prayed for an older couple, one guy got a word for a lady selling tickets who looked at him shocked when he told her, and I told a hostess how beautiful she was and that God has incredible plans for her future, to not give up. Mostly really simple things, but the impact those simple things sometimes had was so amazing. We also got a lot of rejection. When I approached one lady at a slot machine and asked if I could pray for her ankles, she told me no and said, "I just want to gamble!" But fear of man was being broken in those times as well :)
Another group met a prostitute trying to escape her pimp, and when they told her about the organization we were there with, it turns out she was supposed to be meeting with them soon, but she was very afraid. Her encounter with our group members seemed to give her the courage to go through with it!
The next day we went to Carson City (Nevada's capital) to minister to people at the Nevada Day Parade. We found a coffee shop that turned out to be owned by a pastor's family, which sends the proceeds into missions. They have many ministries and told us about the work they see God doing in Nevada. Recently a prayer room or regular prayer meeting was established in the state house, for one thing! We prayed for them, blessed them, and then they did the same for us.
Just outside the coffeeshop we got to pray with a woman who was going through a divorce. One member of my group was in the bathroom while we prayed and when he came out he felt God told him to tell her he was going to restore intimacy to her her heart, having no idea what she was going through. When he gave her this word she broke down crying and just clung to him, then hugged each of us and thanked us profusely.
These are just a few of many, many stories. We all experienced SO much breakthrough personally in our willingness to step out and look potentially foolish, but finding that many more people than expected were receptive and open! Though I didn't personally lead anyone to the Lord, I know I planted a lot of seeds which I trust the Lord will grow and others will have opportunity to reap later in these individuals' lives. Praise Jesus!!! I can't wait for the next trip.
Of all the options, why this one? For one thing, I feel possibly called to ministry that partners with women one-on-one who need inner healing, and ministering to women coming out of sex trafficking certainly is that. But also, I just want to be stretched so much! I want to be pushed far out of my comfort zone so that the only way anything can happen is if God works through me. Well, I guess this was God's pick for me too, because I got accepted for this city service and just returned from my first trip to Reno!
As our first trip, we learned a lot about what fighting these issues even looks like in Reno. Prostitution is legal in Nevada, and the sex trade and casinos are what largely fund the state, including the state's schools. Because of this, simply bringing girls out of sex trafficking isn't enough to fix the city's problems. We were sent out to minister to anyone and everyone, not just looking for prostitutes. And the organization we partner with is involved in working to change the system, not just individuals. Our team (which will be about 35 people including second and third year BSSM students) got to pray and prophesy over many of the organization's team members and women who I think have been brought out of trafficking. You can imagine, their work is very difficult and holding on to hope is a constant battle. But they were so encouraged and strengthened by our team, it was so amazing!
Our first afternoon we went out and ministered to homeless people. That night we went into the casinos and on the streets to minister to people, and the next day we went to Carson City (Nevada's capital) to minister to people at the Nevada Day Parade. I've never done anything like this before! I was really nervous but experienced a ton of breakthrough, both in taking personal risks to talk and pray with people, in praying for healing, and giving prophetic words. I was so surprised to find how receptive people were overall. Though we definitely faced rejection (breaking off fear of man), we also got to bless so many who were deeply hungry for love and for truth! Following are several testimonies/stories from this weekend...
When we were sent out to minister to the homeless, a guy in my group challenged me and another girl to go after a lady who walked by us while we were ministering to a homeless man named Steve. Up to this point I had allowed the more experienced members of the group take the lead as I observed, but now I was being forced to lead! I practically ran after this lady and when I caught up I asked her if she was in a hurry. She willingly stopped to talk and right away asked if we knew a guy named Tim (also from our team, in another group). I learned later that Tim had just ministered to her and bought her chicken, and she told us she was just singing Jesus Loves Me to herself as she walked. But when I told her we felt like God told us to come pray for her she said she would gladly receive prayer from us! She had bandages on her knee so I told her I'd pray for that and she wanted prayer for her family as well (without giving details). I prayed over her, telling her how much God loves her and how obviously he was pursuing her to tell her that today. I prayed for her knee which she said was feeling better, and I prayed for her family. I felt led to pray that she would bring peace to end fighting and conflict in her family. When I finished she was in awe. She was so blessed, so thankful, and felt so loved, and she said it was as if we saw straight through her! Because it turns out she just finished taking conflict resolution classes because she so wanted this for her family. Her name was Esther.
I also got to minister to a beautiful, vibrant older homeless woman named Devony. Devony is a believer, and so she was very encouraged as we spoke to her and prayed for her back, and much of her back pain went away. We prayed for provision and for deep relationships for her in this time.
In the evening, we split up into small groups and went into casinos. No one in my group had done this ministry before, so we were very nervous and wandered for awhile trying to get up the nerve to talk to someone. A man named Doc was a casino worker, and when we walked up to him he did a magic trick for us with cards. He was kind of a strange man, very intense and good at what he does. When he finished we talked to him a bit, but then we all began to walk away, all feeling a pull to pray for him but not knowing how. Something in me rose up though and I felt like, what do I have to lose?! I said "hey Doc, do you have pain in your feet?" and he told us that he does have pain in his feet from always standing. I asked him if we could pray for them to be healed and he (surprisingly to me) said yes! He stood there staring at me as I began to pray for him. I first blessed him, calling out things I saw in him like a kind heart and great intelligence. Then I prayed for his feet to be healed, that all the pain would leave. I blessed him and prayed he would know God's love for him. I could be wrong, but I thought as I prayed and looked in his eyes that I saw tears. He thanked us genuinely, and we went on our way.
After that, I was so worked up and excited! The guys with me were so affirming and thankful I stepped out, and we got bolder from there. We talked with and prayed for or blessed many people who were at the slot machines, talked with and prayed for an older couple, one guy got a word for a lady selling tickets who looked at him shocked when he told her, and I told a hostess how beautiful she was and that God has incredible plans for her future, to not give up. Mostly really simple things, but the impact those simple things sometimes had was so amazing. We also got a lot of rejection. When I approached one lady at a slot machine and asked if I could pray for her ankles, she told me no and said, "I just want to gamble!" But fear of man was being broken in those times as well :)
Another group met a prostitute trying to escape her pimp, and when they told her about the organization we were there with, it turns out she was supposed to be meeting with them soon, but she was very afraid. Her encounter with our group members seemed to give her the courage to go through with it!
The next day we went to Carson City (Nevada's capital) to minister to people at the Nevada Day Parade. We found a coffee shop that turned out to be owned by a pastor's family, which sends the proceeds into missions. They have many ministries and told us about the work they see God doing in Nevada. Recently a prayer room or regular prayer meeting was established in the state house, for one thing! We prayed for them, blessed them, and then they did the same for us.
Just outside the coffeeshop we got to pray with a woman who was going through a divorce. One member of my group was in the bathroom while we prayed and when he came out he felt God told him to tell her he was going to restore intimacy to her her heart, having no idea what she was going through. When he gave her this word she broke down crying and just clung to him, then hugged each of us and thanked us profusely.
These are just a few of many, many stories. We all experienced SO much breakthrough personally in our willingness to step out and look potentially foolish, but finding that many more people than expected were receptive and open! Though I didn't personally lead anyone to the Lord, I know I planted a lot of seeds which I trust the Lord will grow and others will have opportunity to reap later in these individuals' lives. Praise Jesus!!! I can't wait for the next trip.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)